cuz i love what you do and think you have a big dick!

Because I have cancer. :(

well i have no balls!
or a dick!
(and yes i am a guy!)

Pick me! Pick me! Why? Because...

*slurp slurp*

Oh yeah that means plz make me a mod

i also have small hands so i can type fast!
so...pick me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Because I AM YOUR FATHER! :O

you did my mom and did not pay!
so this is how you shuld repay her by leting me be a mod!

Sanjay's the only one who responded who's even qualified, and he's already a mod...

As for me, I would be honored to do it. I don't take crap from bad users, and would ban anyone if I even had the faintest suspicion that they were thinking about breaking NG rules. Half the threads in General are what I would consider spam threads, and many of them I would at least lock if not delete. And there's plenty of poor quality users who would find themselves on the end of a ban if I were to get a chance...

if you dont let me be a mod i will kill all the people who love you!

Frist off, have fun in London, and piss on the queen for me.
Also I'm a cunt, and I hate n00bs. so, that has to be worth like 10 points.
I don't have a job so I'll have more free time then alot of people.

well me haz no job so ha!
tons of free time so dam it let me be a mod!

Because I have almost no posts on the forum, signed up for Newgrounds yesterday (admittedly, for the third time) and I have been a moderator on numerous other forums; always the strictest, most feared of the team.
Additionally, I am the best candidate because I possess the awesome ability to realize that I will never command any sort of respect or have any influence in a community this large and popular.

i need it the most!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
what ever you want i can give you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!111111111
let me be a mod!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111

I'll do it. I'll randomly lock a topic without reading it, and ban people that I just don't like - just like a real mod.

Because i love poozy ?

In the off-chance that this is legitamite, I feel I'll throw my hat in for a while.

I moderate on a different forum called 2kinds.com, as Avwolf. I don't pick fights with losers, and I can sense drama a mile away and know how to snipe it dead.

In other words, I'm your man. =D

who the fuck gives a shit!
X-Gary-Gigax-X

nobody thats who gives a shit!
so pick me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

fuck it.

fuck it pick me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!111111111111

Yo man remember me?
Fuck it, this is'nt a tome for modesty or formalities

PICK ME PICK ME PICK ME WOOOO I'LL BUY YOU DRINKS IN LONDON MAN!!!

pick me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!1

I shall make a fair and direct argument to support my claims of being the most qualified mod on your userpage.
PICK ME YOU DIRTY GOATFUCKER.

As you can see here:
http://igott.newgrounds.com/news/post /237725
(I fucking lied about quitting.)
I hate Nooblets. I have Trolled Noobs, Flamed them, and hell, even made a few threaten to kill me. I am very strict with power and don't let the defendant defend his (Because all motherfuckers on the Internet are male.) own shemale ass. Unleashing me with Mod powers is like Unleashing Me on Sonic Faggots. People will cry, People will resist, but in the end I win by slapping my fucking dick across their face.

And also I'm pretty sure I've been on the forums (well general at least...) to know how they work more or less (2 1/2 years +5,500 posts anyone?) I've recently had a phase of near-backseat modding in trying to help and point out mistakes on the forums (with links when possible)
also I love you
And I'd like to think that most of my posts are legit, they're all pretty much perfect in grammar/ punctuation terms but I do try and contribute some kind of point or discussion with every post I make,rather than just the deluge of 'lol that was funny' posts you see around.
I started out as a truly crap forum user, and worked my way up to become (at least I hope) a fairly decent one and thus have experienced all levels of BBS faggotry first hand
ALSO I'LL SUCK YOUR DICK YO

I AM A GO-GETTER.

pick me!
i am your #1 fan!

I feel I'd be the best candidate for a temporary moderator because I can type with proper spelling and grammar, I spend all day on Newgrounds and animating, so I definitely have the time for it. I've been on Newgrounds (with this account since '07) since '05. I have aspired to be a mod because I feel the quality of the forums have dwindled down a bit since I first came to this glorious site. I do not take any shit, so when people like to break rules a lot, or give me, good people, or other mods shit, I will not be afraid to smack them in the ass with the metaphorical ban-stick. I also contribute to this site monetarily and with free advertisement on my youtube account. I am also not just saying this, but you are one of my favorite mods, because you are fair, but lay down the law on people who really deserve it. So, Poozy i hope this speech sways you towards picking me, but I will be happy with any other decision so long as you pick someone with good responsibility.
Your trusty Newgrounder,
Michael Winans(Dragonberry)

You need to give ME moderating duties because I have lived on NG for 34 years, even though I'm only 25 years old. You know I will do a bang out of order job, ruin your account totally, so that when you come back, you will be hounded like a dog, hunted down and murdered by mass legions of NG fans and noobs. I will be blameless see, I have committed the perfect murder [or in this case, the perfect fraud] and I will log back into my account and laugh horrendously at your downfall, at your naivety in giving me such a meaningful respectful job.

But on the other hand, I could just run things super efficiently and then hand YOU the reins back when you return.

Or would I?????????

Yes of course I fucking would!!!! I'm a trustworthy person.

Or am I??????????

Ok, I admit, this deliberate mystery is not helping my cause.

If you don't give me mod duty, at least give me a free t-shirt for winning the comedy competition you started.

I'm applying because I'm the administrator of an Phpbb Forum and I understand that noobs like to spam random pictures everywhere they possibly can. Unfortuantly, my co-admin think that it is "To Harsh" To ban some asshole for spamming. Here, Its completely natural, so I think that i would Fit the job while I am sick with a sinus infection here at home
I will ban like a crazy person who is looking for noobs to eat. Also, I usually am not at the liberty to be using great grammar, But on this occasion. I believe that these noobs will Fear me and my non grammatical errors.

Thanks. And Happy noob pwning in the meanwhile.

Sure, I'll submit my application.

I feel that I'm responsible enough to know the difference between what is and is not a turd in the BBS. I've modded another site before, and I know from experience that I am a very cautious person with the ability to moderate. I take close consideration in a thread's material before making a decision on what to do with it. In any case, I believe that I have the power of judgment needed to accept the job, so there you go.

The amount of

*OMG SLURP SLURP*

in this news post astounds me...

We as NewGrounders are going through difficult times. The BBS, once a clean forum for discussion, has been taken over. Taken over by spammers, trolls, and jews. We need to elect a mod official who will not only remove the waste they leave behind, but also ensure these evil doers never hurt the BBS again.

The wind of change is calling for this day. Together, we can make change happen. We can turn the tide and create a new, safer BBS. Stand for change, fight for a better BBS!

WHAT

poozy plz let me b a mod, i rel god @ modin' cuz i usd 2 mod @ anudda sight!

I feel that I am an ideal substitute for several reasons.

First of all, I have been here for a couple years. This is beneficial in that I am not the user that says "BBS sucks so much now a days!" but I also have been here long enough to know how it works, and what's to be expected...I know what does and doesnt cross the line.
Secondly, I have had enough locked threads and bans to understand the reasoning behind them. I have even made a thread discussing why it is that a lot of bans and locks go unexplained. It got 16 replies, and died. NOT A SINGLE MOD RESPONDED. Conspiracy!
Thirdly, I do not want to be a mod forever. I hate the idea of having to spend all my time watching the forums and being under constant criticism, yet a week sounds like enough time for me to benefit from the experience to learn and grow, and to understand things in a mods perspective.
Fourthly, I am no dumbass. I am a junior in high school, and take Psychology, English Honors, Trig and Functions, have had 2 years of Latin, and now taking Spanish I, and I am in AP American History. Im not a stuck up calculus prodege, but Im not brain dead either.
Fifthly, I am not as much of a jerk as you are. Lets face it...you're an asshole. A necessary asshole, but an asshole none the less. A week of me showing people kindness would have people miss your badass, and bring an end to this "I hate poozy" age.
Sixthly, you cant think of a good reason why I shouldnt be.

-TheWolfe

have you read any of my posts? i am a fucking dickhole who loves to fuck around with people and like to be driven mad with power!
oh yeah, and my name has a fucking animal in it!
so yeah, if anyone fucks around making gay ass threads i will ban the fucking life out of them and there will be so many people banned that it is gonna be like fucking china for ban-ville

^^ LOL

I am as much a motherfucker as you are.

Ask anyone who knows me. They constantly compare me to you (they mean it as an insult, but really, it's the highest compliment I've ever received).

I'm even known internationally, having been to London myself. Pwn some noobs over there for me!

I Think that I could be a mod because I am a mod in other forums and I love pwning people. I just want to know what it feels like, and if you pick me you won't regret it!

You're joking about giving people your pass, right? Hopefully you are. Ha ha.

Also, takes some pics of London for me!

Pick me. I desire power, and a chance to show everyone that I am fully capable, but I have the self respect not to write an essay like the cockmunchers in the comments surrounding this one. Also, it would be funny.

i fucking hate everyone on NG, especially ppl who write long ass responses to shit like this, so mod me and I'll ban the fuck outta em....

i should be you because im an asshole and not very funny!!

I'd like to fill in as a mod, if you don't mind.
I'd pwn those noobs so hard their mama's come away bruised.

I would really want to have this opportunity mainly because everybody says this is the power of the gods, but its easy to see its just shit work just dealing with us normal users; most of us don't even contribute little or anything at all to NG. And really there are some assholes on NG that I personally want to wave the ban hammer on when a spam topic is re-re-redone, so don't worry about the ban quota. I would be proud to have at least a week to be a mod, and then cry as I have to relinquish the power at the end of the week.

Lots of hugs- TBoA

I AM responsible and it will be awesome and just because

Rofl.

You should've put a pic to go along with this one, I don't know... something sexy, that says 'suck my mod cock for no reason'. ;)

Have a good trip btw. <3

http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view /467006

I shall cause much of this.

lmfao

labusch

LOL

The replies to this news post made me LOL.

wow. i read the first batch, and it's kind of sad that people don't see through the ruse.

also, to clear up confusion - you aren't maddox, are you?

You should pick me
Why: I think I've learned enough about how crap works. I know what people should and shouldn't post about, and thats honestly all I can say

Oh crap, I am also quite active on most every forum, and I dunno if this will help at all but yo obviously know I don't suck mod's cock.

because i would fucking ban everyone who deserves it, ban some of the fuckers who don't deserve it, and lock all the shitastic topics that flow through the bbs like tacobell flows through me.

not it

Because I have experiance at being Nazi Mod!!
no really look [url]http://antoarts.com/forum_/[/url]

Poozy we are best buds. I really want to get a taste of what modship is. I want to see what it really is like to have that power. Imagine me, WingCommand, the kid nobody knows, finally getting some recognition. I ask you Poozy my pimping pal, to go deep down into your twisted penis, and give me modship! And if I do a bad job, I'll let you Ban Me for a long period of time. Think about it, it's a win-win situation.

Sincerely,
~WingCommand~

I would like to fill in If you read my post you will see that I follow the rules(For the most part) I'm usually on and I'll love banning noobs, I'll BEAT your ban quota and be a good mod at the same time.

Your not really going to give someone else your password right? Ah well, have a great vacation. (You could use it.)

What a fucking lie, one week of not modding doesn't require a replacement. Nice trolling there.

Because I'm not a faggot sucking up to you right now, "I wub poozie kueaslea"

I would take the job seriously, not ban everyone for dumb things, and pwn noobs better then you. :)

I posted why in the thread.
But does Tom give you permission?

Just do it.

well, im on often, and i dont work much, so i could do it. i'd give u my account and password in exchange for the time being if u wanted for collateral. i'd listen to ur wishes and be a good mod. pm me if u think i'd be a good candidate!
Thanks!

lol i love you for this. the comments were a good read. enjoy london pooz. :*

I'm not on alot and will probably not even do anything at all. I wouldn't pick me if I were you.

I'd like to give it a shot, simply because I'm actually not retarded, I know how the forum works and I know not to abuse power.

But yeah. Good luck everyone else.

I...might as well post an application for this little part-time job here.

First off, i'm not going to be a suck up like almost everyone else posting here. Whom ever get's picked, best of luck to them, i'm not whining.

Well now, let's see...qualifications. I've been on the general forum for roughly a year and 5 months. I post often, and i lurk like a beast. I've studied the rules, and rarely to i purposely break them. I know the difference between a spam thread, a helpful thread, and a utterly pointless and useless thread.

Am i up for this task? Yes. I am. Currently, i am juggling a part time job, and moving into a new house. No school, no friends, and plenty of free time to scope out the BBS with fellow moderators.

So, why should you pick me? Out of all these other outstanding candidates? Well, here is my opinion. I have a heart of stone. I do not/will not, play favorites, and succumb to bribes, threats, e-handjobs, no. Break the rules, i punish. edn. Second. I respect this website, and the rules that have been created. Rather than use this position to become a tyrranous overlord of banning destruction, i will do the job you ask me to do, to the letter. And when you get back, it's all yours.

Currently, my hours of availability are
Sunday: All day, all night. On and off, because i have errands and such.
Monday-Friday: afternoon, and late night
Saturday: mid-day, mostly night

Well, there ya go. May the best cunt win.

surely I'm the motherfucker you're looking for.

Oh, and I tried guessing your password, didn't work.

I tried Cunt, motherfucker, Poozy, and I think that's it.

hmm.

now am I supposed to act like you, or am I supposed to be a "good" mod?

Next time chop n' block.

I would Love to be mod for many reasons.

1. to find out how it looks like.

2. to help the BBS.

and 3. to be worshiped :3

You are such a bastard. I love it.

HEY POOZY PICK ME I WAS A MOD ON AN PHPBB FORUM WITH LIKE TWELVE MEMBERS AND IM AN RLY RESPONSIBLE PERSON ON NG I KNOW THE RULES BY HEART AND I LIKE TO PWN NOOBS JUST LIKE YOU COME ON PICK ME I THINK YOU ARE AWESOME PLUS I'LL SUCK YOUR DICK

I will mod!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My dick is solid 7.5 inches. Fat and juicy. This alone qualifies me.

BECAUSE THEN I COULD FINALLY FEEL LOVED

Honestly, I doubt this is for real, since I'm pretty sure that a mod can't give his password to regular users (for reasons that I hope are obvious). Rabid lost his modship in part due to giving his password up, and since you probably know htat, you wouldn't risk doing this if it would cost you your position, because that would be stupid. This is most likely just some crazy prank, you sick little monkey.

HOWEVER

I recognize that this could simply be what is known as a "Christmas Miracle", and may be actually happening. I have some free time, so I may as well give it a shot so you and the rest of the mod team can laugh at me for being a gullible tool.

Basically, I miss the days when I was new here and the moderation team would hand out bans for fucking sneezing. There were no warnings; the ban WAS the warning. People didn't freak out due to bans as much back then, in my opinion, since they were more frequent. People were sort of used to it. Then the mods relaxed, and now these new little punks think that THEY run this place, and whine and moan and spray period blood every time they get a 3 day ban for posting malicious links and calling everyone a faggot.

Now, I probably wouldn't be a very harsh mod, but if I had to make up for your absence and ban quota, I'd adjust my policies without any real qualms about it, since this shit needs to happen one way or the other. Plus, in a sadistic way, I'd like to see how it feels to put some of these little pricks in their places when they start acting up and breaking rules.

also i run a php/bb forum and have ample experience in administrating this kind of thing i even ran a counter strike clan once surely that counts for something

But I don't want to be a mod !

I feel I'd be the best candidate because I actually think before I do crap on the BBS. I haven't been too active lately when it comes to posting because it's always the same old shit with these people. I can be an awesome guy to awesome people, and a total dick to stupid cunts, as you put it. Without letting the power go to my head, I could definitely keep up your with your ban quota because half of the people on the BBS are dumb asses anyways. You may be a hard ass, but you're extremely entertaining when you pwn all those noobs. If you pick me, I'll give it 110% to beat down all stupidity in the forums.

POOZY

This is why Rabid-Echidna was demodded.

Thought I'd let you know.

I doubt you'll pick me, but i'll give it a shot.
Because i've been here since 06, and I have a fair judgemental mind.

Also, whether you know or not, this was the reason Rabid-Echidna was demodded.

You people are idiots. There's no way that Wade would ever allow this, he'd be demodded. Look up what happened to Rabid-Echna. It's a wind-up, you've been had.

By the way, coming to London doesn't actually mean you can't moderate anymore. England's moved on from the tea strainer and has started buying into this 'computer' lark. Great fun, what what.

And also, to the people who've made massive paragraphs saying why it should be them: shut the fuck up. God you sound like losers. Yes you too Elios.

I would like to do it. I'm pretty mature (unlike many people), I won't abuse your account, again unlike other people, I'll lock any thread that breaks the rules and ban anyone who breaks the rules.

LOL! Seriously, you would be banned. I just want to see the look on peoples faces when they think that they could be a mod for a week. Hahahahaha!

I can just imagine all the five year olds who will be asking for mod around here with no reason at all. I'll go through all the replies in search of comments like that.

Well. Im on holidays for 6 weeks. So i don't have a whole lot to do. There fore i have the time on my hands to moderate the BBS. Oh and i can be rough on some BBS noobs if need be. My pleasure..

Thanks anyway

Because I can.

Srsly, why read people's applications, just read their (my) posts, you'll see it's me you should pick.

Hey poozy, i think i would be good for the job, because i've always wanted to be a mod, and i have looked and studied the locks you make, I think i would be great for the job. I feel i'm good because i always express my posts clearly and i would always like to ban a sinner of the rules and i would like to lock thread that are crap.
Please pick me poozy for a mod stand in and you will not be let down!
I promise!

Lizzardis

If I applied, I reckon I would somehow regret it. But being Poozy for a week... wow.

Hey, what bout me? If anything goes wrong, I live in London too, you could always come to beat the fuck out of me if I screw up :)?

Btw, I was actually being serious. I'd love to do it. I never "pwn" noobs hard because I want people to have a nice feel when they see my username, so completely killing the insides of some helpless 10 year olds would make my month!

LOL

lol, this is so funny. What is even funnier, is the fact that some people take it seriously and comment here trying to impress you.

...

YEAH I PLZ CHOOSE PICK ME, BECAS I'M ADD AN DUN LIEK MOSST OF THE PPL ON TEH BSS SO I'LL BANN PEPLE LIEK ALL TE TIMEE TO KEEP URS BANNRECKORD IN TIP TOP SAHPE N STUFF! OMG DIS CUD BE MA TCHANSE TO SHO TEH TOM FLUP WATTA GREET MOD I'D BE YEAH

Is this a trap?

Somehow I doubt this is for real and that it is probably for the laugh, seeing as you'll get dozens of "CAN I MOD PLOX???" responses, however on the off chance it is I may as well give my two cents.

I've moderated on other forums before, so I know how to deal with all the bullshit that gets thrown the way of moderators. I'll be very active during this time period as well, so activity isn't an issue. Spam and spammers annoy the living fuck out of me, so I'm sure I could fill a decent ban quota if needs be. I'm usually a fairly nice guy, but if someone needs their ass handed to them, I'm well capable of doing just that.

That's pretty much it I suppose, I still doubt this is legit but meh, no harm in throwing my hat into the ring I suppose.

I think I would be best because I'd be a massive cunt for the week, and pwn for the lulz...

I'll be a mod. I can do stuff like that. I've had alot of experience of forums and know them very well.

pick me because I believe this is entirely real, even though people have been demodded for doing this before.

xxx

I'll ban every cunt and still be fucking ungodly like you. Yes, very ungodly.

"Listen up you little fucks" does this not seem appealing?

f this is a serious offer, I believe I would be well suited to the job. My posts are always well written and serious, I can enforce authority and I'm very trustworthy as well. Also, I've modded flash websites like Newgrounds before.

I think I should fill up for you.

Why? Well, I'm in a unusual time zone, and whenever I'm on there's usually chaos in the forums due to the lack of mods being in the same time zone as me. And i'm not power-hungry, so there a small to no chance that I'd give out unreasonably long bans, lock threads which aren't filled with shit or ban people I don't like. I'll also keep everything that happens in the mod forums private and such, and I have a good sense of judgement. If you've banned me in the past it's only because I was trying to get banned, not ignorance of the rules and such.

Also, I'm not the type of person to just up and leave home, therefore making me available from around 12 AM to 12 or 1 PM, all week if there's nothing going on. On Christmas eve I'll probably be gone though.

And I can tell if a thread would turn out shit or not by the first few posts, And I'd lock threads that can't go anywhere productive, like perse a photoshop thread with a terrible ( low quality or nothing interesting could be done to it ) base pic.

Also, your password would be safe with me, since after all I wouldn't get anything from giving a friend your password.

May the best cunt win.

let me mod - everyone loves me in the audio portal! :P

besides we need more gay mods :P

I forgot to mention that Floridians don't take shit from stupid fucks. I'm a Floridian.

Wait, this won't get me mod... oh well, ban my ass on Christmas day for the lulz and have fun choosing the new mod from the mess of comments.

I would be responsible, lock all the spam topics, post well written and thoughtful posts when I could, and above all be respectful.

Awwww..... mushy mushy.

Yeah, I'll totally suck your cock.

Let me do it.

While I am online the newbs will tremble in terror. I shall destroy any shitty MS paint or photoshop thread i see, and possible ban the people who posted in it for "Posting in a spam thread."

I will leave awesome and funny locks and ban people "for teh lulz."

I am the best person for this job. I am like the Obama choice. Pick me, I am a better choice then any body else.

Because so far, Ive been on NG almost every single day since Ive been a member. Granted, I'm still on a ban that you gave me, but due to the fact that I almost never leave, and a decent idea of whats bannable/deletable, Im perfect for the job!

Well, I think I'd be good for it because I've been trying for a mod for quite a while (but failed mostly) and it's something I've wanted to do. If I were you I would follow the rules and try to act like you.

I should be the mod because I am you so I would do the best job. Duuuuuuuuuuuuh!!!

Well, I've always thought I could do a better job than you, so I might as well give it a try. Pick me?

'Sup poozy, it's me, some guy you've most likely never actually spoken to besides maybe a few seconds of conversation on paltalk.

I want to be a fucking mod for a week, and truth is that I'm a douchebag. I have no tolerance for people who do stupid shit. You need someone with an iron fist to rule while you're gone? Choose me, dammit. I may not have a crane, but I have the powers of hardly needing sleep on my side, leaving the forum moderated nearly 24/7 while you're gone.

While you're gone, there's no doubt going to be idiots posting whatever they please because they think other mods are lenient Fuck them. I'll rape whatever hopes they have of breaking the rules, and then laugh at them while they PM around asking to be unbanned.

That's not to say I'll go mad with power, however, I realise that I have to be responsible and not ban everyone who looks at me funny with their magical internet eyes.

And so, I want to be a mod for a week, and you're my only way to do that. No one likes conflicting opinions.

If you look at my ban record a large majority of them are for backseat modding so I must be doing something right. Plus, I already have experience having sex with all the NG reg's mothers anyways so the switch from you to me would be smooth. I'm also on the BBS a lot anyways so I might as well be crackin' skulls while I'm lurking.

And hey man, I wrote you a song. Obviously I'm better than everyone else. >:(

Pick me! Because I'd love giving long ban times and I can piss off your enemies!

Can the nominate others?

Ismael92. For the lulz. And cos he's awesome. And obeys the rules. And stuff..

Why would I be the best? I dunno

My chance!
I always get pissed off whenever I see a spam topic. I don't PM anybody, because it'll probably be deleted before I do anything, and I can't post there or I'll get banned. So yeah, I want to get it to get back at the spammers by deleting their topics quickly, and banning them. Hard.

I'll suck your cock better than Gagsy, hell better than anyone on this forum.

Truth.

Hah! I ACTUALLY fell for this. Lol, lookit the little resumes.

Good day to you, Poozy.

I wanna fill in for you because:
I've been on the BBS a long time, and know what is stupid, what is right, what is wrong,
what is abusive. etc.

I would lock crap threads, with some witty humor for teh lock message!
I'll ban users for bumping threads, just like you once did to me!

I've seen much of the mods' work, and see what they find wrong, and after awhile, have understood what they find bannable/lockable/so on...

<strong>MOST IMPORTANTLY:</strong> I have read and understood the BBS Rules at least 160 times since I joined Newgrounds!

darknessdweller hopes you see something good in all these reasons.

choose me because i KNOW the bbs rules and i will give people the ban that they deserve. if they break one of the "big ones" i'll give em' 5 days, the "other" rules 3 days. another reason i should fill you in because i am online 75% of the time and i spend about 4 hours minium on the bbs so please choose me. thank you

I am gonna make an actual claim, unlike a lot of people:
I wanna be mod cause I visit te forums a lot (I don't always post, though) and a lot of times I see shit topics. What pisses me off is that they don't get locked! I saw an old topic where some guy wrote the AVGN theme, but changed the lyrics slightly. It was spam, but never locked! And a lot of times, I make topics that get locked for no apparent reason! I just wanna be able to lock shit I see.
PS I've always wanted to be a mod, but since I haven't been here long, I doubt it will ever happen

poozy i mad u that banta claus song

LOL i don't think it will be me.

If I got to do this I think I'd ban myself with excitement.

if you let me be mod you'll be my bestest friend

Poozy my man,

I could Mod for you because I'll ban people really hard, as you said. I've been a user for a while and know the way of the woods. I'm a responsible user who frequently visits the BBS.

If I were in your place, I'd choose me. :p

Cheers,
Frenzy

Well I'd apply for the job, but since I'll be going to London too after all, it's kinda useless :P

you should pick me because i have been studying the ways of the poozy for many a year now, and i have learned how to Bash nubs and lock threads...

Well, I would really like to take place in being "mod for a week", because I you were actually the moderator I look up to. I would ban anybody for any bad reason what-so-ever.
Im on newgrounds BBS everyday for hours. Plus Christmas vacation is on Monday so a full week I can use. There is also another week left. Im your man. Im your bitch.

Now please.... I would LOVE to be moderator for a week!

I love poozy as well.

honestly just give your account to another mod... putting it into another users hands is like telling a kid to not push the big red button....

If last year's anything to go by, sunday all we'll do is ban each other.

also lmao, this is epic.

You're a cunt, and I'm a cunt. Great cunts think alike. Great cunts get fucked.

SoulMaster71 is kissing cunt right now.

ALL ABOARD THE GULLIBLE TRAIN.

Anyway, have fun in London. I assume it is for the meet. Wish I could be there.

NO WAI GUHSZ ID B BETTOR DEN U AL FUK U AL POOZI PECK ME I WIL BAN DE NOOBLES I WILL BAN DEN NOOBLES DEN THEY MAKE ME REAL MOD!!!!

Forgot...I also have a good whistle level.

Can I just operate your crane for a week? I mean I do live in florida as well <.<....>.>

Sounds like a good offer. I think that I would be good because I know the rules and I enjoy seeing the forums clean of shitty things. I know my post count isn't that high, so I can understand why someone would think I don't come here that often, but it's low because I didn't post here often in the first year that I was here. Now I'm on the BBS frequently. I also hate seeing people make bad threads, seeing people posting retarded things, and I hate trolls, etc. I can be an asshole at times, but that's only when I see somebody do something really stupid on the forums and I feel that getting a little aggressive is the best answer (just like you, Poozy, although you're a little higher than a little aggressive). I hope you will consider me. (Pwning noobs is fun!)

I'm on the forums a good deal, and I believe I would do a good job banning and locking with a horrible, sarcastic, almost PMS attitude. I will make sure that nobody stops hating the name, "EyeLovePoozy"! THIS! IS! SPARTAAAAA!!!!

Earthshine should definitely win. He's so sexy, awsome, funny. He knows the rules. He hates spammers and trolls. He is just all around awesome.

Because I would like see what is like being a mod. :)

I can`t hide the feeling that i actually want this, and i feel horrible for it.

EyeLovePoozy, listen to me. Or read me. I'm the person you're looking for. I'm an experienced 16-year-old who can do this job. I've been in the forums for years! I know every section of the forum very well and I know nearly every user. During my stay here I got to know what was stupid, intelligent, spam, and I know all kind of posts. I know when I have to to ban the people and when I have just to delete the post/thread.

My posting quality is nearly perfect. My posts are always very long (around 30 or more lines), informative and helpful. And my grammar is almost excellent (I make one or two mistakes every now and then, because English is not my native language. However! I take English classes and I'm very experienced with this language!) Every thread I create is great and contributes a lot to this community where I like to be. And I would also like to moderate it, but that's not all!

I've been a moderator in other forum for years. I can PM you with a link to that forum, when currently I'm an excellent mod. I don't want to show off, but I'd say I'm the best moderator in that forum, and there are about 13 or 15 mods! But wait, this is not over yet!

I have been banned a couple of times, I admit it! I've made mistakes, and I've been banned for every single of them. However, I've been penalized only 4 times during years, so I'd say my ban record is pretty good. But yes, I have been banned in the past, because you know, no-one is perfect.

And you said you wanted the "new mod" to be like you. Well, I think I'm the right person! I'm very strict and I think that people can only learn if they are punished, or in this case, if they are banned. I would be the bad guy, such as you, or even stricter. And another good thing: I'm very active. Currently I'm on holidays, so I'm online about 20 hours per day. Sorry for not being more active, but you know, I have to sleep too (I eat in front of the computer so that's not a problem). I'm also a good friend of current mods, so I think I would be a great addition to the team.

So, take your time to consider it. I'd say I'm (nearly) perfect for this, but I understand if you think another person is better for this job. I understand my responsibilities, and I would do a great work. But hey, this comment is not a joke! This is as serious as your news post! I repeat it: this is <em>not</em> a joke!

Yours faithfully,
Ismael92.

...As it is an quite obvious joke.

THIS is why EYE love Poozy.

I have such little chances of being picked for this that this post is practically pointless, but I feel that I should volunteer for this position since it is only a temporary job.

Firstly, I would like to say that my posts are of a good standard, if you look through my recent post history you will find little or no posts that are of a typical quality. Unlike a lot of Newgrounders I make sure as much of my posts are at least 2-3 lines long as possible, apart from my replies to some of the NG News threads, you will find that the majority of my posts are three or more lines long, many of which stretch onto five to six lines, which is actually far above the typical poster's replies. Post quality may mean little in fields of moderating, though it's small things that make the difference. Secondly, I have experience. I already moderate several other forums, none of which are as large or well established as Newgrounds, but I do have some experience, even if it is on forums with only around fifty members. I also promise not to abuse the power, I will only lock, delete or ban if the thread clearly breaches the rules, for example a thread sharing links to malicious websites or torrents for cracks or other pieces of illegal software. If there is some obvious spam I will destroy the thread, too. If I abuse the power you can slap me with a month off the BBS. I browse the site regularly, so I have a lot of experience here, even if I have been here for less than a year. I participate in several Newgrounds based activities outside of the site including the Stickam chat, which I've been using since it first started. I'm still using it a lot now. I can be trusted, and I have been trusted by several users of whom have given me their passwords while they're away from the site so I can deposit their experience for them. I have taken no other action with any of these accounts, I just sign in, vote on five submissions and I'm out. Most importantly I fully understand the BBS rules, although when I first signed up I didn't quite get the hang of following the backseat moderating rule, now I realize the point of it all, and it's a good idea, in my opinion, of course.

I know that my chances of winning this are puny but I feel that is is my duty as a Newgrounder to try to protect the site and volunteer for as many opportunities to help as I can.

I'm hoping either Ismael92, Gagsy or Elios will win this if I can't (and I pretty much can't).

I have to win, mwmike. This is serious business. And lol @ fish1892 for nominating me.

Because noobs infuriate me, I hate hate HATE repeat threads, and finally, FUCK OFF.

That is all :3

Ismael92, you are a knob-head.

Yours faithfully, someone with a brain (something you and many others clearly lack)

The amount of smarminess in the replies is eye-wrenching.

Thanks for the compliment, knob-head.

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

*breaths*

ahaAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

*breaths*

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

OMGOMGMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE PLEEEAASEE
I BEG YOUUU. ILL DO IT FOR YOU POOZY ILOVEYOUAAAAAAH.

Wait, i take back my request.
It looks as if there's a grammatical error in your username.
I cannot work with such standards.

I can fuck many mothers within 3 hours, act as a good (and extremely mean) role model for the newfags of the site, and still maintain a well respected, normal status among my fellow newgrounders.

That and I'm pretty responsible and mature.

...enough

Hell's yeah! I'd be the perfect guy to moderate as you. I'd be banning bitches and fuckers till no tomorrow. I'd be on patrol everyday. And probably half of every night. But there is no possible way for anyone to be as awesome as you. But I'll be better than anyone else on here.

This guy! I am an excellent candidate!

And I'ma make you proud...

Think about it...If I took over for that month, it would be like you were never gone...

I know how you roll...I would continue the legacy!

Ban me for half a year if I'm wrong.

Read the fucking page, people. He's looking for A MOD. If your not a mod, fuck off. ;)

Hey, Poozy. I really think you should make me a mod, because:

1. I may not have been around for long, but my post count is rising like Chuck Norris' boner. I'm on all the time, and I'll definitely be able to ban many bitches in my time.

2. I've learned from my mistakes. I know the rules, and won't make any more mistakes as you do.

3. I'll give you a handjob.

Hey we go back a long ways d00d remember when I went on paltalk and then you commented on my profile? That was the golden days man and now you owe me for the sexy nights I DEMAND BANAL STUFF N***A

Can I be a mod?

my dick feels funny

You're not going to let anyone become a temporary mod.

That would mean you'd have human compassion and that's sometihing the real Poozy would never have.

Well.... In your account picture I realized you had no balls. Do I win the contest?

Anyone worth their salt here would realize that they cant keep your ban quota up without causing a time paradox.

You should know better sir.

My face is less than or equal to your face.That is all.

Here's a quck suggestion, have your mod status removed then have it reinstated upon your return.

Wow, an even easier solution.

BTW what the hell are you doing in my country? I never invited you, you're not allowed in the free world.

Ahahahaha, what a bunch of fools.

Well to tell you the truth i can't really tell you i will do a good job, but i will try my best. If I'm gonna be covering for you i need you to write me down a bunch of one liners if i need to ban some one when they get out of line

Hope you pick some one that does not fuck up

http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view /474777

All new christmas flash is back.

I could do it if you'd like.

This should be fun. I'll apply - I know I've been banned 20 times in the past 5 days, but that's beside the point. <3

I forgot to say my main reason, and that is that I am a gullible cunt.

Stfu and pick me.

i dont care i have no opinion on this pick me anyway

pick someone else.........

Im not feeling too shit hot, nor am I even up to it......

(I mean it.....)

Are you asking a MOD to have your account for a while or some weirdo fucking n00b guy to get your account and mess it up?

So ban and pwn noobs hmmm I think I can do that. Maybe not as well as you can but I think I would do you some justice. Although I may be too nice to be a mod. Idk Have fun in London Town

I want to legalize marijuana and gay marriage.

Oh, I seriously doubt you would give up your password but here goes nothing, I WILL BE MORE BRUTAL THEN YOU, I obviously woudnt ban people who didnt deserve it, BUT I WOULD PWN THE MOUNTAINS, SHAPE THE EARTH AND RAID HOLY HELL UPON TEH NOOBLETS..

my references - TacoFreak, Augustana, InsertFunnyUserName, CHunter.

I'll be happy to work for you and suck your dick later kthxbai

ill do a great job poosy
i read the rule 10 times after you banned me for 20 days and you suggested i re-read them so i did =D
i know them by heart and are planning to make myself a handbook

I'd ban random people and lock the worthiest threads around, because I'm too lazy to do it right.

lmao @ all the faggots trying to apply for a temporary modship.

You're not going to get jack shit. Fuckdicks.

No thanks I have better things to do in my life. Thanks anyway.

Do you like?

http://spamtheweb.com/ul/upload/3408/
81642_Poozy.png

You COULD choose me, but since i'm not that known here you probably won't.
I've been browsing the forums since 2001, around that time, so i know most of the rules.
But do be carefull, I don't want you choosing one of those evil fuckers that want's you de-modded, or all hell will break loose.

Well, I believe that I would be a swell mod. I think if I became a mod for the week, I'd learn quite alot. But don't judge me, I can absolutely shatter noobs aswell. Why should you choose me? Simple. I always work professionally when it comes to serious things like this, I understand that this is a rare oppurtunity for the people of Newgrounds and don't take that for granted, I'd really like the experience personally and as corny as it may sound, it'd be cool to help/meet some more people around the community. If you have any more questions for me, then just ask. :3

'cause i gots nice boobies :D iono.id suck as a mod..im just here to be conform with all the other weirdos on NG <3

i wanna be a mod cuz my dick bigger than ur

No, i love poozy! Cmon

I will clean up the noob infested videogame forums. You will come back and guarenteed to see no "LOL ROCK BAND VS. GUITAR HERO!" threads. Ever.

I also have no life whatsoever. That way I can mod more.

I think I would be up to the job because I am a trustworthy and responsible newgrounds user that won't hesitate to give everyone what they need, good or bad. I think I could be a could be a mod for you because I think things over before I speak them, and I use spell check. I think I'd be a good mod because I always accept it when I'm wrong and follow orders to the check. if I am am accepted to be your replacement I will act as mods always do act, responsible, and I'll always have a good come-back to the noobish users that try to be clever and mean to me.

I hope this application fills your request, if it does, I will be very happy to fill you in, if not, I will kick and scream like a little girl, no Jk Jk, I will be very happy for the user you pick over me, btw, enjoy London!

Yeah, right.

Cause I think this is just a joke. Prove me wrong. :P

Btw. Have a splendid trip. :D

It's the blog that just keeps giving and giving ;')

I wonder who the best cunt will be...

I offically lost all of my trust in Poozy. I for one enjoyed each week or 2 getting laughs out of the 'school pet peeves' topic, but sense poozy has ONCE AGAIN locked a topic that did not deserve it, he is offically on my shit list. I know he doesnt give a shit, but if I ever had the chance to have an even slight chance of taking him down, I would. I actually used to feel that poozy was getting bad shit he didnt deserve from newground users, but now I belive he deserves it AND MORE! Fuck it, im joining the dark side.

because you just love me to pieces!

Fuck all of them I have the biggest cock, no i'm not going to suck up and say you have a bigger one. It's been my dream to do it, And I practice on either ones that will soon be locked, or have already been locked.
Once again i'm not a faggot pushover suck-up.

I doubt you will do it anyway. First off, someone could change the email, then change the password, unless mods have it differently, or if you contact an admin or something. Otherwise! You're risking a shitload, mod madness, someone would go fucking banning their enemies. Although I don't have enemies. And I do my best with grammar and spelling. :)

: BTW I live in jacksonville Florida, same state baby. FLA BITCHASS

im in florida too...O_O orlando...

Because I brought this petition to de-mod you to your attention

http://www.petitionspot.com/petitions /DeModEyeLovePoozy

Naw, just pick Elios.

I am applying.
Most likely won't even realise this comment is here, but here I am.
I don't think I'll feel too comfortable being inside your account, feels like an invasion of privacy, but oh well.

Yeah, well, I've PM'd you in the past saying this noobs and doing shit and shit you should pwn them etc.

Seeming I'm australian, that is around about when all the spammers and shit come out, so I could pwn their asses right then and there, other than if you don't I'd have to sit here waiting for you mods to awake and pwn them yourselves.

And to my conclusion.

MOD ME BITCH. >:[

Here's to another 200 applications. Keep 'em coming guys, some of you have a really good shot at winning this.

I'm ruthless towards obvious noobs, i'd be a good choice because i will certainly be able to keep up with your ban quota.

EPIC troll

Here is why I would be a perfect temporary mod:

- I am a very reasonable person and my friends turn to me for advice because they think of me as wise.

- I can perfectly emulate your modding skills.

- I know how to keep my cool even when I'm mad.

- And many more!

For more details, please PM me!

Because I probably don't take anything seriously at all. In fact I don't take this seriously. To hell with it, I need to mod something before I asplode.

Reading some of the comments makes me laugh.

I will also be in London, so choosing me would be rather pointless.

On a serious note, give it to the only good mod in the history of Ng modships - Redcircle.

I'm not applying, but I'm just wondering, will you tell us who 'won'?

Poozy Baby ! Its me your freind kaywire heh ! You know that il continue your beautiful and amazing legacy/religion for the time your gone.

Heh il make sure everyone still remembers you as you were and no one dare`s to forget just cause your gone.....your spirit isnt there cause im there to replace that spirit.

Lol on the other hand if your serious i would love to be mod for that while and i guess i watched you quite a bit and i seriously think your awesome i love you just as much as i love stamper. ( pretty much alot ) and yea i guess id do what you do and have awesome lines in end thread and just be Eyelovepoozy :D .

~ Your buddy kaywire.

Fucking fag you fucking banned me

Pick a moderator. I'm sure that regular users will go corrupt, and we'll all get fucked.

I sent the pm. I hate all the ng fags meaning, all the competition and will ban some whiney bitches. Plus I am evil and have a darkened soul

I'll also ban the fags who spammed here.

Hey, Poozy, why not. I work 3 or 4 days out of the week, but I should be able to go on NG for an hour or two during the day and keep the place tidy for ya.

PM me, babe.

I can do it man, I just got 3 day BBS ban for trolling. I can pick a target and make life hell for them.

Sorry for commenting again but i forgot to mention im online for like Shit loads of the day EVERY DAY!!!

Pick me because i will pwn noobs.
I think having the ban hammer in my possession would be ban-tacular as i'd ban anyone for the slightest thing HAHAHA It won't just be hard on noobs, it'll be full force no lube hard on noobs =]

I back this is up with a love <3

I'll ban people sooo hard. And anal rape them. Come on man, pick a god damn winner! ME!1! Plus, all the others aplying are fags.

I'm also on alot

Lol @ anyone who took this serious.
I mean, 250 comments in 3 days? What the fuck?
Anyway, merry christmas poozy.

Yeah but, most of them were like, OMG I HATE YOU POOZEY U BANNED ME ME OF ALL PEOPLE. Also he loves me, I hasn't gotten banned, and he knows who I am.

Pick me!! You've banned me enough to make sure I know the rules! now let me loose on ng with the almighty ban hammer

Come on poozy, let me use the ban cock.

wow really? but your underwear would be be tight on me since your tiny penis... is well... tiny :P

Merry Xmas Poozy

So did your kid have a good Christmas? He like his power wheel?

Yeah what that dude said. Hope he liked his 900$ mini car!

Attention whoring cunt. It's Wade's job.

GIMMY GIMMY GIMMY

All these other guys are weak fags and willbe trampled on and laughed at. I will stand strong and rape them if they mis behave.

BOSTON CLOCK:FOOR MOD IN THE NEWGROUNDS BBS! HE'S THE WISE CHOICE.

Have you seen these faggots? They suck cock and deserve to die. I'm the only one who'll do a good job. Meaning, ban and lock like crazy.

It was wayyyyyyyyyyy too early for April Fools Day.

Hahahha

I was gonna go to the london meet, but then couldn't be fucked.

I'll pwn people who aren't even noobs or fags I'll double the quota, half of the bbs will be banned when you come back.

Poozy, your the biggest fag in the whooooole newgrounds website.
Now go sit in the corner

come on dood when are you going to make the choice? when you do, choose me

cuz i'll ban everyone else who applied to fill in for you

I let you do my mom without pay. AND SHE SWALLOWED!!!

Pick me. I'd do you.

This contest is a good idea and will most likely end with your mod privileges intact.

I hate everyone on this site. Everyone. No exceptions. Including you. Especially you. You have too much power and I don't appreciate that.

I'm pretty much just like you, except I don't have a shiny golden aura.

You can change this.

Because I'll get the job done and it'd be nice experience something new.
I you don't pick me, at least choose Ismael92.

Pick me, I'll do exactly what you want. I'll go nuts, banning everything that moves and locking general until Wade decapitates your former account.

I'm serious if you are.

I'll nominate myself but I'll hope that you won't pick me.

Muffins :)

Well i'm a nobody so um only luck will get me the password I've been on Newgrounds for 5 years now

I really hope you think long and hard on who you let in on this man.

Enjoy your vacation.

pick me cuz im the unexpected choice.

Hey, hows it going? I have decided to sacrifice my time to mod the BBS if you choose me. K, thanks.

what if the person changes your password and bans random ppl

Jesus some of these cats are pretty pathetic, if giving you a blow and calling you daddy is what it takes then im not doing it.

WHich to choose... Hmmm.
A) Try to act hardcore like poozy so he'll pick me
B) Actually try to see if poozy wants us to be responsible
C) Give Head

Well i don't know, what if I choose all of the above?

Nah, this ain't gonna happen. When Wade sees this, he'll shit bricks and probably do something about it.

I think this is a joke though. 280 comments to keep Poozy entertained. WOW. Hahaha.

I'd love to be mod, because I'd be able to ban noobs hard and pwn em while their sleeping. Also, Im really active.

You can't go wrong with me.

Thanks for the nomination, bananasrus09. lol, like 3 people have nominated me so far, even when I'd suck at being a mod lol.

'Cause this news post is so serious.

Is this still going on?

http://www.newgrounds.com/bbs/topic/1 002490/2

I had no clue you were a Rey MYsterio fan.

well, time is coming near, i hope i win poozy, especially since so many people thinks it's a scam

Lol.

Me because I rule.

The responces on my thread were fucking hilarious

I think I should be able to fill in for you because I know you will never give someone your username and password to fill in for you. i believe I am a candidate because I can see through your ruse.

Lolparadox

I'm the best candidate because you stopped me being emo before you were a mod.
I have learned from you Mr Poozy sir.
You must trust your subordinates if you wish them to be as great as you.

Cause you fucked my mother. Proof: http://www.newgrounds.com/bbs/topic/1 006308
Also, i love banning people

Don't pick me, I'm a total faggot.

pick me! I have no actual reasons for my nomination!

D: Anarchy!!!!!!

umm.... are you sure that is wise?
that's asking for a hacking
or is there actual people around that are genuine?
anyways goodluck

Another reason, I am one of the only people that can be trusted, half of the bbs hates you due to being banned. I have no hate for mods and if I ever get banned for something stupid I laugh. I've only been banned twice for 3 and 2 days. 3 dayer, trolin. 2 dayer, back seatin. I also know if I change the password I'm fukin doomed and also have no need to. I am the safe, awesome, smart, badass choice.

Because I'm a motherfucker too.

Because

I got the 300th comment.

i would abuse my powers by banning people i don't like, locking topics that don't warrent a lock, and being an outright cunt to people.

on the plus side, i would serve up a 3-day ban to anyone who used a 4Chan fad of any kind.

please pick me because i think you are the greatest moderater ever and i will do my best to do all the amazing things you do PLEASE pick me for the job

hei, omgz some guiz on DA FORUMS tlod me 2 go 2 u an how do i bcom ppular on newgrounds?

OMG OMG CHOOSE ME I MOD AT ANUTHERRR CITEE

Haha I don't believe it.

*Pigs Fly South*

Wtf?

well i think i would make a good mod because i have been here a long time and i have nothing better to do

Most of this shit is so stupid I feel embarrassed reading it.

I'm not even going to try. Haha, this is everyone's biggest time to Bullshit. I love reading the creative messages people post XD

I'm the most awesome user.
Yet I do not request being a mod. Give it to someone else if you will.

Give me your account you shit, & I will try out being a mod.

It's kind of hard to imagine that anyone who's profile consists of an "I Fuck Your Mother" banner and a stick figure with a massive penis spinning in circles will take any kind of mature and serious application seriously.

Also, there was no other sham wow parody thread, I checked before I posted :D

Hahahaha

Because im hoping we're all gonna get thrown into that thread asking to be mods and ridiculed to the point of us all shitting our pants.

This news post is an epic win.

Because I will link to your audio saying You're Banned every time

LOL at this

Because the only thing better than pussy is pwning noobs hard.

I recommend the Baseball guy, he's pretty awesome.

bcuz i wan to shooot goerje bush lol xD

ooo
ooo
I pwn noobs with my awesome pig fumed infused lazorzzzzz
can I haz mod powahs kthx :o

because i fucked your mom.

I'd like to say that I would like to try moderating, if not for a short time, simply because I know the people on this forum and I know how they are. That might not make sense, but I feel like knowing the people and their humor would really help with some of the moderation activity that goes on here.

To be honest, I realize that I won't be picked and I'd just like to take the opportunity to try and get something done.

Listen a guy like you needs a guy like me. Mod me up. I will have the BBS under fucking lock down. I will not hesitate in pwning every noob in to the future if I even see them bad mouth you. You think I'll stop there? No. Anyone as cocky as that deserves the full Poozy treatment. Listen, I know a guy who has a massive (an I mean massive) cock. Now, it's just under your category of size, so he'll give him HIV and make him bleed, but he won't kill him. He'll just fuck him up.

You need someone to rule the BBS under a rusty iron AIDS infected hammer, and I'm the man for the job. I am the best cunt, the best dick, the best ass. Whilst you delve into the realms of our glorious nation, I'll be here, pwning them until they cry blood.

So do you want a guy who can use your mod powers to their full potential? Or do you want someone who does that liiiittle bit extra? Mod me up. You'll receive a complementary handjob just for enquiring.

I can be a bit of a mindless dick sometimes, but I can be serious and actually keep order in the BBS. Or what order that is in the BBS.

I can't say stupidities like "im a gud poster" and stuff, but i think that becoming a mod, even for simply a week, would be great.

I hold no grudges against people, and i would try my best--Even if this is all a joke...Meh, i'm being too deep. I need some fucking sleep, it's midnight around here in Brazil and my spine feels cracked and spent.

cock joke!

I be mod now?

I'll ban anyone that posts anything stupid that I don't like. ;D

Also, A WHOLE WEEK WITHOUT POOZY?! To bad I'm already banned (and by request too lol) =P

Hey poozy! Pick me! I'll suck your dick.... I sweat it, I will. Right now, lets do this! But seriously, I hate all of the assholes I see on the bbs, I'd love to ban, oh I'd fucking love it.

*winks* And I'm serious about the blowjob.

I will not fall into your list of people who you will be ban... OH SHI-

no I'm not funny

i know the rules quite well, im cynical and i ban people without reason. am i qualified?

Iwon't just stop at banning, I'll torture. I'll give people 1 day bans, then when they get un banned, ban 'em again, until I get 20 pms for the person, then I'll ban 'em some more. Oh, you can use that method poozy, it's the best way to pwn.

C'mon poozy, I'll ban em.... I'll ban em' HARD.

If anyone thinks this is real, they have AIDS in the brain.

Wish I may
Wish I might
Have this I wish tonight
Are you satisfied?
Dig for gold
Dig for fame
You dig to make your name
Are you pacified?

All the wants you waste
All the things you've chased

Then it all crashes down
And you break your crown
And you point your finger
But there's no one around

Just want one thing
Just to play the king
But the castle's crumbled
And you're left with just a name

Where's your crown, King Nothing?
Where's your crown?

Hot and cold
Bought and Sold
A heart as hard as gold
Yeah! Are you satisfied?

Wish I might
Wish I may
You wish your life away
Are you pacified?

All the wants you waste
All the things you chased

Then it all crashes down
And you break your crown
And you point your finger
But there's no one around

Just want one thing
Just to play the king
But the castle's crumbled
And you're left with just a name

Where's your crown, King Nothing?
Where's your crown?

Huh!

(Spoken)
I wish I may
I wish I might
Have this wish I wish tonight
I want that star
I want it now
I want it all and I don't care how

Careful what you wish
Careful what you say
Careful what you wish
You may regret it
Careful what you wish
You just might get it

Then it all crashes down
And you break your crown
And you point your finger
But there's no one around

Just want one thing
Just to play the king
But the castle's crumbled
And you're left with just a name

Where's your crown, King Nothing?
Nothing

No you're just nothing
Where's your crown, King Nothing?
No you're just nothing
Nothing

Off to never never land

- - - - - - - -
That's why, cunt. NOW I BEST BE GETTING THE JOB OR MY DAWGS BE PAYIN YOU A LIL VISIT

Come on Poozy, we go way back...

hahaha! Just kidding, nice prank though.

because this song is awesome and so are you. *slurp Slurp SLURRP*
And because i need the cred.

Helter Skelter Lyrics
Artist(Band):The Beatles
Review The Song (10) Print the Lyrics

Send "Helter Skelter" Ringtones to Cell

When I get to the bottom I go back to the top of the slide
Where I stop and I turn and then I go for a ride
'Til I get to the bottom and I see you again, yeh, yeh yeh

Do you, don't you want me to love you
I'm coming down fast, but I'm miles above you
Tell me, tell me tell me, c'mon tell me the answer
Well you may be a lover but you ain't no dancer.

Now Helter Skelter, Helter Skelter, Helter Skelter, yeah ...

a-Will you, won't you want me to make you
I'm coming down fast, but don't let me break you
Tell me, tell me, tell me the answer
You may be a lover but you ain't no dancer.

Look out!
Helter Skelter, Helter Skelter, Helter Skelter, oooh...
Look out, 'cause here she come ...

When I get to the bottom I go back to the top of the slide
And I stop and I turn and then I go for a ride
And I get to the bottom and I see you again, yeh, yeh yeh

Well do you, don't you want me to make you
I'm coming down fast, but don't let me break you
Tell me, tell me, tell me your answer
You may be a lover but you ain't no dancer

Look out!
helter skelter, helter skelter, helter skelter

Look out! Helter Skelter ... she coming down fast
yes she is
yes she is
coming down fast
oh now helter skelter ... woo hooo

(yelled)
I got blisters on my fingers!

Is that really my mom on your banner?

I have super cancer.

because im fucking cool, and i want to weild the ban hammor

cuz if u let me ill suk ur dik 4 evar and evar and can u plz unban me???

poozy i think i would make the spot because i have the rules memorized by heart, if you believe it or not i read the rules every day before i post anything just in precaution.
also i dont care what other people think so i would ban people and lock threads with no remorse just like you.
i have a pretty good aspect on how long certain bans should take place.
i also know the difference between something that should be locked or someone who should be banned.
ive seen you lock threads all the time and i know when you would lock something.
i think i would make the best candidate because i have alot of time on my hands to be modding (im on at least 6 hours a day)
i also have the same sense of humor as you
if thats not enough and you want to know anything specific pm me
in my honest opinion im 3x better than the rest of these shits

There are a lot of assholes on the BBS that need pwning...and I am good at pwning...and you are the next best thing to God so...

I would just rather use your computer to jack off to porn. So when you come back, your keys stick.

it should be me... because in my mind, i am a mod. I am you. I am everybody. I am a mod. I am banditsuit. I am Tom Fulp. I am earth. I am your version of meatspin up there. I am not stamper(too many dick jokes...)

I would be a terrible candidate because I'm extremely unfair, biased, and I would ban people for the hell of it. I also would delete topics that are helpful, and ban users that I don't like. I also hate small children.

Reverse psychology?

Well, im not going to bother trying to impress you, or feed your ego, its big enuf as it is, I,ll just say im an ass, and a fair judge...too things that realy dont go well together.

PICK ME POOZY

OH and i know the rules

and i ban them with my almighty BANNING HEAD

I think any of these dumb cunts could easily fill your shit shoes.

I mean enter name, hit button, Banned.

How hard could it be? I mean a genius like you can do it right ?!

I honestly think I can mod for you because I know how much you ban and how many times you have banned me! I understand your quota and your noob pwnaged so I think I can actually go from my experience (you banning the fuck out of me) and kick the shit out of anyone who gets in my way. I WILL BAN ANYONE AND EVERYONE!!! Why? Because that's what Poozy does. He bans. He holds the banhammer!

- Love Chaosbeam I WILL UNLEASH CHAOS WITH POOZIES BAN HAMMER!!!

I'll fill in your ass with my penis if you want.

That joke's been made, hasn't it?

Fuck you and your delicious lies.

I hate trolls, and spammers, they fucking bug me.

I have too much AIDS, I cunt.

You just love attention don't you?

You're a wanker.

Mod all of these people.

I want to try it out.. It'd be a good trial for me.

I'm not abusive, I'll follow the rules. Make some locks of my own but let some other mods get them if they're online.

can i be mod (vO_o)

i think you should pick me because i am hardcore badass. i don't fuck with noobs and i don't accept bullshit. i've been around a while, PICK MY ASS!

If you get this far down this crazy ass list i will be amazed. I work Construction Like you, therfore have plenty of experiacne handing people there ass on a silver platter if they fuck up. I wont go crazy and act like an Idiot. I am on NG everyday and would sety aside time to mod the Forums Daily.

If this is real, then aren't you afraid the person you give the account to changes the password?

Excuse, but... does anybody else think it cant really be true, I mean, youre a mod, you must know that it wouldn't be safe to actually give a password to a random user, you know, it could be an alt. I'm just saying that for the BBS's sake you should give the pass to someone you KNOW is trustworthy, I mean, I must say you're my favourite mod, so I wouldn't like to see your reputation ruined... o wait, maybe it's a double test to see who could figure it out... my mind feels fucked.

I'M SORRY!!!!
I made a bad topic, and when you locked it, it made me feel immense amounts of guilt.
I'll be more carefull from now on.
=D

Well, here are some of my reason.

Ive been trying to be really dedicated to what I post and try to help out as many users as possible, I know many people do, but im always on the site, like when Im home, im ALWAYS on, ask anyone.

Also, I believe I deserve this because a while back, I got banned, topics locked, and I always joked about it with the Mods, and they usually un banned me, unlocked, whatever because I dont take it to heart. EyeLovePoozy, I believe one time u locked a topic of mine and I sent you a message because of your post and we had a nice laugh (what, i think I still have that post *searches...*)

Really, I know there are many more people who would want this position a lot more then me, and a few others who actually deserve it more then me, but I think it will give me a great confidence boost, and it will also help with my reputation, not just being me, but as a fellow newgrounder who is always trying to help.

This would also help me to boost up a lot of my stature, <- dont even know what that means :P

So how many of these commenters have you banned so far?

i want to b mod cuz i look gay on stickam

List of Twilight's alts, please.

YOU know i am the the most responsable... and right behind you in age... just admit it

Soooo, hows it going Rabid Enchida?

I'm an 18 year old prominent member of this community, I grow weary of the late night spam with no moderators online (aprx. 2am-6am est), and I don't rape children. Nuff said.

cause :3

I hereby Apply to be better than you could be lol

You might be joking here, but I want the job so here's the reasons for picking me.

You could choose me, because I go on Newgrounds EVERY DAY,
I won't ban people for no reason, but I'm not afraid of pwning those who deserve to be pwned. I would carefully consider threads before locking them.

My spelling and grammar skills are as good as yours, plus I can think of witty one-liners and things like that if I need to.
I've always wanted to see what it's like to be a mod. I love the idea of upholding the Newgrounds law, and I think spammers and trolls are only going to stop if mods punish them.
Having read other peoples' posts, there's not much I can say that differs from what other people have said.

All in all, I'd be thrilled to get the job, and I think I would be an excellent mod.
And a badass one too :D

Amg no fuckign way i live in Miami Florida 2 :)

Because I've done it before.

It should be me because I'm a motherfucker that likes to fuck with people for no reason.

I'm not looking to go on a rampage here and make a name for myself. I know the rules and I have the time. I can spell correctly and I'm not in the business of fucking up. It seems like a good opportunity to get a closer, hands on experience with Newgrounds.

Thanks for the consideration.

I've been an admin on a forum before, so I'm pretty familiar with the management business. Also I've changed a lot since 07, and I don't post anything I don't feel is worth reading...

And I'd love to get the chance to mess with some 09 users.

I ARE NG AUDIO MOD I CAN BEAT YO ANYTIME! D:<

because i have never been banned 0:)

I'd love to fill in for you because I've always wanted to have a go at modding.
I want to see what real modding is like and how hard it is just so I can appreciate the job of a mod properly.
I'm quite new to the forums but I've had a lot of experience with other forums on the internet.
As far as asskicking goes.
I'd say I'm not one to be messed with.
I may appear weak in the way I post but out of anything on internet forums spam is the most annoying thing and is something that needs to be dealt with harshly. A couple of bans would not be too hard to hand out now and then.
Only too deserving users though.
If I am picked when you get back there will be no such thing as a troll.
I will have almost a troll cull.
Please consider me and I look forward to hearing your answer.

I'm an administrator for the Lock Legion, and I do a pretty good job of keeping the locks in line. I also made an entire flash series called "HNT" that was dedicated to explaining the rules of NG to nubs. ;)

N****r jew.

'Nuff said.

MrBlunt, FU, jew powa. LOL. And jujube, not content with the LL anymore? Branching out? :P

You know perfectly well you're just gonna run into random guys' houses in London, take their computers, and banrape people from there.

If you make your way to No. 10 Downing Street doing this, tell the Prime Minister I said 'hi'.

Cuz umm... u think of the reason plez? :( :)

You should close this post now, more people are going to smell a fake when it's almost the end of the month.

can I do it next year? I can prove myself to you for a year, and go under your wing as a mod for a week junior.

I can't believe some people think this is real...good work Poozy.

Aci6, I take what ever chance I can get man.

You guys are pathetic.

Come on, this is the 400th comment, PICK SOMETHING!!!

Give it to me. NOW.

I would because I have learned my way around the BBS through lurking and experiencing the tension of being banned.

</Dicksucking>
Oh my God there is a lot of mod dicksucking happening over there. Don't worry guys I'm joining in!
*Takes a deep breath*
<Dicksucking>

BECAUSE I'LL BEAT YOUR DICK OFF

You guys are so gay.

I change my mind, I felt this was merly a fill in for your position and handle the negative reputation, but due to a few changes I think I may be up to it, since this could be a chance to move up Im in, I do wish to change my choice from my last one since it was only a month ago. If this is for being modded I do wish to join in.

for alot of reasons, personally, proffessional, and for future references. Hopefully I should have a fair chance.

Sounds fun. You will pick me.

b/c i have been currently banned for the next 28 days and wants to post on teh BBS

Because I will carve you a banhammer made out of the crushed and compressed skulls of the people who don't agree with you fucking their mom. And I'll add Dr.Foreman's stuffed, tsantsa-style dickneck to the end of the hilt of the banhammer, to add a comically grotesque hint to the whole thing.

It is hilarious to see all these people take you seriously. But I know you better, Poozy. There is a very good chance (and I believe this to be true) that you are lying to see the stupid comments people would leave. Let me tell you, it's been very funny reading some of these posts. People are going 'Pick me, pick me. I am a smart poster, I have good spelling, I spend all my time here, I'll kill for this job, etc. etc. etc." It's just saddening to see people do this. Until of course, I realize how hilarious it is too see them beg. Oh Poozy, how I love your subtlety.

: Pick me. Pick me. I'm better than most of the BBS, so I can lead them. I'm not arrogant, why would you say that?

slurp slurp